I am a time traveler. Time traveling is a remarkable feeling, for time traveling is a disjointed, emotionally wrecking experience. An experience of rifts through strata. It has made me blunt and insensitive when I am expected to be sensitive. Akin to attempting to explain self awareness to a lobster. Or a worm. But there is awareness there and there is no bragging to say I am more self aware than a lobster. I am a lobster as well, scuttling along the floor of the ocean like a cockroach feeding on the debris of lost lives and events gone past including pieces of myself sloughed off. But as a time traveler, detritus also arrives from what non-travelers would call “the-future.” I feed on those “bits-of-the-future” rested upon a plateau of solitude. I have no expectations of comprehension from the non-travelers I have encountered, parlayed or loved. As such I come off as brutal and uncaring, or worse as “selfish.” Is my type of schizophrenia any different than your schizophrenia or your perceptions of flow? Of course it is. Everyone is a schizophrenic, bending flow and truth to your will. So it is. So it was. So it shall be. flow=reality.
Non-travelers will find themselves deeply offended and puzzled by my behaviours. I offer no recompense for such misgivings and rejections of who I am. Non-travelers can only take the bits they get and order them in the fascism of the unidirectional line. I do walk alone, but my line is constantly broken, escaping, fractured and falling back or turning on itself. I fall off it’s narrow width, or misstep entirely as data communicated through another means outside the membranes and barriers of energy/matter, register somehow by a method unknown in my experience, which one would call “consciousness.” For do we have a better word to describe the totality of experience? Perhaps we could try with some sort of agglutination. “being-in-the-world-with-sensates-unbounded-by-mechanical-senses-or-time.” And that totality of experience renders the truth malleable, fickle and plastic. Is it a wonder non-travelers resort to fascism? Bound reeds of stiff entropy about the axe? The axe to sweep away all who do not adhere, regardless of belief=truth.
I come to you temporarily in this moment as a quickly shifting shade, a non-entity in the mechanico-energy suggestion. For one really only ever has suggestions. Hints. Crumbs and clues. To assume your righteousness is any less different then someone else’s righteousness is foolhardy, inconsiderate and mean-spirited. These righteousness’s are temporary, vaporous and quickly modified or entrenched depending on how intense your poles are. In the sphere of flow, time does become bent and folded by gravity amongst other forces yet to be “seen” or “discovered.” Please remember it is temporary. Please restrain your contempt. I speak to me, I speak to you. I speak to no one and I speak to everyone, for… who can say what will become of this message? Who of you? Me? I come to you temporarily to give you absolutely NOTHING. I will only take what you have to proffer. I am a selfish motherfucker. But by acknowledging that, I can become free of it’s fascism.
I travel and am frequently confused by the messages I get. Many times they only are answered decades later on that line. How would you feel if you kept getting messages or images from places out of different times, from the past as well as what turns out to be the future. I do not seek pity from you, for that is a lie. As big a lie as victim-hood. We will love and hate in turns, one hand washing the other over and over in the flow of the water of the universe and “being-in-the-world-with-sensates-unbounded-by-mechanical-senses-or-time.” Your righteousness is as fraudulent as mine. truth=fraud=belief
I am a time traveler.
I am a time traveler.
I am a time traveler…
